I up and left.
I completely relocated to the city I wanted to live in, with no real job prospects in sight.
Smart move? I am not sure right now - with no job to fall back on, it doesn't feel like the right decision. It feels like a mess. There is a university in the town I have moved to that does research in the field I have worked in, but it is the same old song-and-dance - positions need to be posted internationally (which means up to a year before anything materializes), and no funding to hire anyone. And, it would be some stupid academic postdoc with no future after the funding runs out. Sure, they like what I have done and would like me to work for them, but obviously I can't do it for free. I knew this when I moved. It seems stupid now, to leave a postdoc that at least paid me for about another year. I try to rationalize my decision with the prospect of an actual career in another field. I know I will be starting from the bottom again, and that is ok, but it is incredibly difficult to convey my skills to people that aren't familiar with academia. I've had a couple of interviews outside academia, with some success, but no concrete job offers. I am now a firm believer that it is not what you know (outside academia), but that you need an 'in' with someone in the industry.
In a way, it is liberating - I can embark on a new career, something with real potential in terms of future development. But this is only an ideological argument inside my short-sighted envisage of the future. Until I secure even the 'next job' or the 'temporary job', it seems as though I have made the wrong decision. I was on the cusp of finishing a great deal of projects with my old postdoc; things that promised productivity (papers/grants/abstracts) in the next year. But for what? Another lost year on the academic job market?
I am very excited to be out of my former position. But, if it doesn't pay off with some position somewhere, what's the point? Don't get me wrong, I am not looking for management-type positions, I just need a foot in the door. Is there anyone willing to give a smart, willing-to-learn Ph.D. graduate a chance? I need a job to start in the next two weeks before my 'holidays' expire, and only time will tell if it will be bagging groceries or building sandwiches for the local coffee shop.
I need to make a living... This point is not stressed enough in the post-academic-leaving circles...
Which brings me to the underlining point - my Ph.D. is completely useless. Even the B.Sc. doesn't do me much good. Is academia the route for you? Maybe, if you are doing a professional degree (engineering, medicine, dentistry), but otherwise, I would say, "Think twice before beginning any degree program". The old adage that you should do something you like is complete bullshit if there is no market for it. How do you pay the bills, even with a job that you love, if no one wants to pay you for your services? Although it is extremely difficult to see the big picture when you graduate from high school, ask yourself the question: "Are there any jobs available when I finish my degree?" Or, "What industries are looking for science graduates?" Basic research at its finest. That, my friends, is what I wish I would have done if I could erase the past fifteen years.
Keeping my fingers crossed for you. Thank you for your brutal honesty in documenting your thoughts and experiences on this journey. As someone who just finished my Ph.D. last fall and is feeling kind of hopeless about my own prospects on the market, I've really appreciated your blog. Will keep checking in and wishing you luck!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your encouraging comments. I sincerely hope your path leads to secure employment in contrast to mine! It's funny that I still have hope, but... here's hoping (for you and me!)
DeleteCongratulations! This is a very brave move and I think you're very brave for doing it. I can say this because I recently left a full time position at a CC in the Humanities and will be moving to my Dream City in about 2 weeks and I couldn't be happier!
ReplyDeleteI too do not have a job but I will temp for a while. If this means I will answer phones for a company, that's fine. What I need right now is confidence. Once I figure out how it's done in the business world and make some contacts, I think I will be fine. But I am out of academia completely and couldn't be happier. I see nothing wrong with making coffee (or in my case, answering phones and perhaps making coffee for the office) for a while while getting my bearings. Also, I know what I want to do but I just need to work my way towards it. Figure out exactly WHAT you want to do and set a goal. you did it the first time with a PhD and you can do it again. Those, my friend, are the transferable skills everyone talks about.
Be proud of your leap, be happy in your life, and set a course for your goals. you will get there sooner, rather than later.
Thanks for your comment. I think for now, all of my concentration is on getting a job, and any job (I have no problems making coffee, etc.) will do just fine. I agree with you about setting a long term goal, but everything is just too blurry now, and I have a bit of a problem trusting myself to go with what I want to do - I did that 15 years ago and look at where I am now. You may be right about the confidence thing.
DeleteAgree! You are so brave! For that, OMG, you should be proud of yourself. Thanks for the inspiration!
ReplyDeleteBrave or stupid? We'll see. I had no intention of being a martyr. It is also hard to be proud of myself when I have completely stripped away my career identity (which also leaks into personal, of course). It's hard to be proud of saying, "the past 15 years have been a waste..." even though this may turn out to be the right decision.
DeleteAnyway, thanks for commenting and for the encouragement.
I just stumbled onto your blog. I, too, am leaving academia. Within the next month, in fact. I spent months sending out applications, and I finally got a research associate position at a small non-profit. It is an M.S./Ph.D. level job, so not even totally "beneath" me as I feared. I'm not quite ready to call myself a post-academic success story yet, but I'm hopeful. Still, I wish I had had the guts to just move to the city I want to end up in like you did, but I was too worried about stability and finances. On the one had, I got my first post-academe job, and I think it has great potential. On the other hand, I'll now need at least a couple years in the "secondary" city before I can plausibly try again for a position in my dream city. I have to stay long enough to justify them taking me straight out of the postdoc and to build that critical in-person network. I hope I'll get to my dream city someday, but you are already in yours. Different routes, but who can say which is the right one? I suspect I'll envy the concrete choice of living locale you made right now, and you'll envy me that I have my first "real" job. I'm sure we are both leaving behind academic contacts who would have us believe we both traded down. Academia (and a lot of the world) runs on making yourself feel better by going "at least I'm doing better than so-and-so" or "I wish I was as successful as so-and-so." Your way has a lot of good going for it, and some people in academia wish they were as brave as you. Keep the perspective as you go through this trying time, and always, always, do the thing that is best for you and your family at the time. All the best. I'll be following this blog now.
ReplyDeleteI stuck it through to the end and finished my PhD, but I couldn't agree more with this post. I have nothing anyone wants to pay for after seven years. People get upset when i tell them not to do a PhD and to concentrate on something else. I warned them they will regret it in the future when all of their non-academic friends have steady jobs when they are still living in poverty. I hope they'll read more things like this!
ReplyDeleteIt's definitely hard to convince other people not to pursue the academic route. Most people (including myself at the time) just think they will be part of the lucky few that secure the fleeting academic professorship. And who can blame them? By the time you start a Ph.D., you have already had a lot of success in academia - good marks, good contacts with professors, awards, etc. But you know what? It really doesn't matter for the most part. All we can do is try to get through the mess and find something outside academia. I applaud you for finishing the Ph.D. - it is no simple task! And I would like to encourage you as you set out finding something else - we need to stick together and I truly hope you can figure it out! All the best to you and thanks for commenting.
DeleteI spent 8 years getting my PhD, and 4 unemployed years looking for a tenure-track position. I got one last year, and this is my second year in my position. A year ago I was so relieved to finally have a job. This year, I'm already pondering leaving my position. I don't want to live where I do, and I realize that finding another t-t position in a place I want to be is highly unlikely. Add to that the frustrations of higher education, and problems at my university. Let's just say that I see even more cracks in the facade of what is academia. After 13 or so years of pursuing this one thing, and being close to 40 years of age, it's hard to think of shifting gears. I'm glad I found this blog. It was a bold move to relocate, even if it gives you much uncertainty. I wish you lots of luck, and thank you for sharing your experience in the blogosphere. I'm one step closer to having the courage to make my own decision.
ReplyDeleteDear Aimless Jones... thank you so much for your blog, and particularly this post. I was ready to walk-away from my lab last week out of frustration with my PI and in research in general. I thought of living the secret fantasy of packing up my bags and starting over somewhere and lead a bohemian life. The fact that you went for it talked me out of it and cooled me down - it is as if you are living the exciting life of a post-academic who moved to the biotech hub city and have grand adventures. I hope you are doing ok and please know that I'm rooting for you. I am on my 4th postdoc position (and starting my 4th year - and I have zero publications), and knowing academic career is really out of the question, I'm still struggling to catch up with the skills needed in the real world. I should have jumped ship a long time ago. I'm now just trying to find a graceful exit out of the lab and academia. I've had a phone interview for a field apps scientist position and so I'm hoping that would be my ticket away from the bench. I wish you luck and I hope you post again soon.
ReplyDeleteDear Aimless Jones,
ReplyDeleteI can relate to your story as this week I finally gave notice and left my lab. In spite of having salary support from a training grant, I was stuck with a "mentor" who massaged data, changed research tracks every week, and withheld information about the funding status of the lab. I tried desperately to line up a position before I left but competition for Ph.D.-level positions is stiff. Plus, it doesn't help that I didn't gain many skills in my postdoc. On a positive note, I am finally job hunting the hard way - requesting informational interviews, attending any and all networking groups, and volunteering as a writer. Even though I know it is better to secure a job while having a job, my postdoc was negatively impacting my attitude so I made the decision to leave. When I finally resolved to pull the trigger, I thought of you. I can really relate to your story so I am hoping that you will update us on your progress soon. Know that you are not alone and best of luck with your new endeavors.
Really appreciate your honesty.
ReplyDeleteI spent 7 years getting a PhD in biomedical sciences and realized that I don't have what it takes to make it in academia. I landed 2 postdoctoral fellowship positions after my PhD, but none of them started due to various issues. I gave up and accepted a position working in regulatory affairs instead. Its a much stable job compared to a postdoc. I had to start at the bottom. I hope I can make a career here. I dont know what field you come from, but its not any easier in bio-medical sciences. There are too many phds there.
Good luck to you. Keep us posted.